I’m a Night Owl, yet most of my adult life I’ve spent a good portion of time trying to turn myself into a Morning Person; trying to beat biology.
I wanted to be the mom who got up before her children and had quiet time, worked on my business, exercised, and read 3 chapters of a book.
Then I would wake my 5 little angels to a home cooked breakfast before we began our homeschooling day.
But I found myself constantly doing the opposite. Once I put the children to bed at 11pm (because they are all night owls too), I would stay up for the next several hours. That’s when I enjoyed my quiet time, worked on my biz, or read. I would fall asleep at 2am, and wake around 7 in the morning.
Every morning I would be angry at myself because I was “supposed” to go to bed at 11 and wake up at 5 AM! I would berate myself with statements like:
- I’m so undisciplined!
- All of the successful people and the experts say early to bed early to rise! Obviously, I’ll never be successful!
- Why can’t I make myself do right?!
- I’m not a disciplined person!
- Why do I keep sabotaging myself!
- What is wrong with me!?
I would follow the experts who would teach “how to train yourself to go to bed early”. But after adhering to their rules and guidelines I would find myself, 3days later, back to bed at 2am.
Which reinforced and expanded my crazy narrative:
“This is proof; I’m not disciplined enough to be successful. Evidently, I don’t want success bad enough if I can’t push through something this simple. I’m sabotaging myself. I must have some deep seat hidden issues that causes me to keep repeating the same behaviors. My poor children will never be disciplined people either. They’ll be unfocused, wishy-washy adults all because of me!” Yada, yada.
Every morning, for 22yrs, the homemade breakfast and homeschooling happened, but I focused on my inability, my flaw, my lack of discipline.
NOW I understand: You can’t fight biology.
Your body is a Being unto Itself. You can influence It. You can manipulate It. But it has innate, circadian programs that will run their course at the appropriate times. It will reset itself even with your manipulation and influences.
Puberty, menopause, body decay are all going to kick in, according to it’s programmed schedule, regardless of how many herbs, affirmations, mantras or surgeries you use to interrupt the program.
You can’t fight biology. Learn how to use it to your advantage.
Hair turned gray? -make that shit shine!
Not a People-Person? - fortunately you’re living during a time of work from home, internet and home delivery! You can be the happy recluse without looking like a weirdo!
Physically Handicapped? - woohoo! Technology makes it easier to get around now more than ever! I saw a paraplegic get out of his van that HE was driving!!
You are who you are. Love it and use it to your advantage instead of trying to fight your biology.
I’m just NOT a morning person, I’m the Night Owl that wakes up early but doesn’t want to interact for a couple of hours! That means:
- no morning doctors appointments
- no early morning exercise classes
- no morning meetings
- and no early morning phone calls. My real friends know: you can call me at 1am and we will laugh all night but if you call at 9am you will be ignored.
That doesn’t mean I’m capricious, lazy, wishy-washy, undisciplined, or slack.
It means I’ve learned to accept me and how to work in my natural rhythm, so that I’m not fighting with myself. Besides, it’s exhausting when you try to fight with your biology.